Sometimes, Reality is Better than Your Dreams
by Ranchan90
Summary: It started out just like any other day. Imagine Ran's surprise when she witnessed something she was never meant to...hear. Please read and review!


_Kudo Shinichi was back._

_He wasn't sure how or why it happened. That part was a huge, disastrous blur. _

_He was, however, completely sure of one thing: he and Ran were lying on his couch, engaged in a tight lip-lock in which his tongue was determinedly battling for dominance. His lips claimed hers possessively, fueled by the pent-up passion and hunger that had waited so long to be unleashed. Her fingers raked through his hair, sending shivers down his spine and causing him to moan into her mouth. _

_He pulled away, missing the cherry taste of her lips immediately, but did so out of necessity, as he hadn't taken a breath in a long time and was beginning to feel dizzy. He cupped the side of her face with his hand, feeling elated at the thought that they were finally together, just as he had always dreamed. _

_She moved her head away from his hold and began to place kisses along his jaw line before moving down his neck. The soft brush of her lips was driving him insane, and his breathing became even more ragged. Before he knew it, her name escaped from his lips, the pleasure he was feeling tangible in his voice._

Mouri Ran couldn't believe what she was seeing…or hearing. She'd gone upstairs to wake Conan up and let him know that breakfast was ready. The door to his room was open, and she could hear movement inside, so she walked forward, mouth open, prepared to cheerfully say "Good morning!" But the words never left her lips, as she was frozen in her spot by the sight before her.

Conan was moaning, tossing and turning in his bed, his breathing labored, with drops of sweat gathered on his forehead. At first, she almost thought he was ill, her motherly instincts beginning to kick in, but something stopped her. It was the sound of his voice. Something just didn't add up. It was filled with…pleasure? …desire? She began to mentally scold herself for thinking something so ridiculous. He was just a little kid! Way too young to be dreaming of anything 'pleasurable.' She took a few steps forward, deciding that she would wake him up and make sure he was okay, but, for the second time that morning, she found her feet glued to the floor.

Conan had just _moaned_ her name. This time, there was no mistaking the lust in his voice. Suddenly, her feet began to move of their own accord. She whipped around, quickly moving towards the door when her elbow made brutal contact with Conan's desk, and she had to momentarily stop, yelping at the sudden pain.

The sound, to her dismay, had pulled Conan out of his…dream, and he lifted his head off his pillow, eyes blurry.

"Ran…" he said quietly, not fully awake, and clearly not comprehending what was happening, but simply pleased to see her. She mentally made note of the fact that he was addressing her without his usual "-neechan," but couldn't find it in her to scold him over it, as she was still too stunned by the series of events that had happened that morning.

"Conan…you're…up…" she said lamely, unsure if he remembered his dream or if he had realized how much she had overheard.

At this, he jolted upright, eyes wide and shocked. He yanked the covers off him, looking down at his torso, his legs, and finally bringing his hands up in front of his face.

"It was…just…a dream," he said weakly. "It's _always_ just a dream." The second statement was said with more force, and Ran could hear hints of both anger and sorrow in his voice. Her own eyes grew wider, as she realized that his had become filled with tears. She'd never seen Conan cry before – another similarity she noticed between him and Shinichi, and, for the umpteenth time, she couldn't help but think how much Conan looked like him without his glasses.

Conan seemed to have forgotten that Ran was in the room, and, feeling that she should be there for him, should offer him some sort of comfort, she took a tentative step forward, softly saying "Conan…?" and waiting for his response.

He turned to face her slowly, as if it caused him physical pain to do so. She looked into the eyes of a child who seemed much wiser than his years. Eyes that were filled with much more pain that any seven-year-old should ever have to bear. Eyes that were wide with horror, as she could practically see comprehension dawning on his face.

"Oh…Oh, God…" he said quietly, realizing what must have happened. "Ran…" he began, determined to keep his voice steady, "What happened?" He gulped, betraying the nervousness he felt. "What did you…hear?"

And, at that moment, Ran knew that she hadn't imagined any of the disturbing events of that morning. Her voice caught in her throat as her feet were slowly carrying her backwards, towards the door, while her eyes were locked with Conan's, because, for some reason, she just couldn't look away. Her mind was overflowing, and she couldn't think clearly. How could this be happening? Conan, the boy she regarded as a younger brother, had been having some sort of...erotic dream about her. She shuddered at the thought. He was seven years old, for Christ's sake! Too young to show any interest in the opposite sex at all. Hell, he should have been worrying about Ayumi having cooties!

She was in his doorway then, and her brain could only come to one conclusion. She had to get out of there. Now. She couldn't face him. Not yet, at least. And she began to practically run down the hall, hearing cries of "Ran! Wait – I can explain!" But she wasn't thinking clearly (for, if she were, she surely would not have been running from a small child), and her feet rounded a corner. Suddenly, she felt a small hand grab onto her arm with much force than she ever would have thought Conan capable of. She jerked to a stop and turned around to find his gaze boring into her, eyes practically filled with fire.

"Ran…" he panted, clearly out of breath from chasing her around the Detective Agency. She made a mental note about the, yet again, missing honorific. Strange that she would notice something like that at a time like this. She opened her mouth to say something, but no sound came out.

Conan held her gaze for a long moment before making a decision. "We need to talk," he said simply and motioned towards the couch in the living room.

She sunk into it, suddenly realizing that her legs felt flimsy, like jell-o, and was overcome by a wave of exhaustion. She sighed. Conan bristled at the sound. He couldn't stand to see Ran upset. She seemed to be upset more and more often lately, and he felt his own heart breaking, knowing that he had been the cause of all her problems.

He drew a long breath, preparing himself to speak. He looked straight at her – God, she was beautiful – and began to reveal his secret…to say the words he knew would break her heart.

"I haven't been truthful with you…" he began slowly, "and I know you're going to be hurt at what I'm about to tell you, and I understand that you may never want to speak to me again." The words were starting to come out in a rush. "And I can't blame you for that, but I need you to understand that I had my reasons for hiding this from you, and although you may not understand it now, I hope with every fiber of my being that you can put yourself in my shoes for a moment and maybe, some day, understand that I did what I did because I was so scared that something would happen to you…that I would lose you." The more he spoke, the faster the words came, and he knew that he was babbling, vaguely aware that he had used the word 'understand' more times than necessary. He had a feeling that everything he had just said was probably incomprehensible to Ran, but he couldn't help it. It was like a dam had ruptured, and the water – his words – was rushing forward, with incredible force, threatening to pull him under.

He was trembling, and he knew his voice had become very high-pitched, even for Conan. He closed his eyes, trying to regain his composure, and they sat in silence for a few moments. He re-opened his eyes, and, again, Ran could see the pain. Whatever he was about to tell her was big, but, for the life of her, she couldn't imagine what it would be.

"I'm not who you think I am." He paused, allowing the words to register, when a thought crossed his mind. "Or…" he began again, "maybe, deep down inside, I am _exactly_ who you think I am." He waited to see if she would understand what he was getting at. He thought he would be able to say the words, but this was proving to be increasingly more difficult, and he silently prayed that she would say it for him. Ran did not disappoint.

"Shinichi…?" she breathed. Her own eyes had begun to fill with tears. All those times she had suspected, something had always happened to prove her wrong, but, this time, her eyes locked with his, she knew, even before he nodded slowly.

They just sat there for a few moments, looking directly at each other, neither one wanting to break the silence. Ran needed some time to think, and Conan – Shinichi – understood that. His eyes studied her face and the wide range of emotions he saw flitting through her eyes: shock, anger, disappointment, pain. It was the last one that was the most prominent and felt like a knife slicing through his heart. But there were other emotions, nearly undetectable, and he couldn't help but wonder if they were real or if they were simply things he wanted her to feel: relief, acceptance, perhaps even happiness? He shook his head, almost imperceptibly, trying to rid himself of such foolish thoughts. The movement, however, did not go unnoticed by Ran, and she finally found the courage to speak.

"How _could_ you?" Her gaze was cold and…what? He wasn't sure. But before he could dwell on it too long, she continued. "All this time, you were right here. You watched me cry at night, watched me worry myself half to death wondering where you were and if you were okay. I felt like…like hearing your voice on the phone was a _luxury_, each time bringing me relief, because it meant that you were still alive. That you hadn't run off and gotten yourself killed. God, why was I so _stupid_? You were right here the entire time, and you didn't say a thing."

She stopped for a moment, a look of horror coming to her face and a blush spreading to her cheeks, and she clasped a hand over her mouth. Shinichi stared, dumfounded, unsure what had prompted this reaction.

"I…I…I took _baths_ with you."

Oh, man. Here we go.

"I let you clean my back. And that time…that nosebleed! Oh, God." She could feel her face getting redder with each second, but her mouth seemed to have a mind of its own, and continued to ignore her brain's commands of _Shut up! Shut up! Shut up!_ "All those times we cuddled, all those times I held you in my lap…I…I told you things! Things you never should have heard…" She trailed off, hanging her head down, and, for a moment, Shinichi thought she was going to cry. Suddenly, however, her head snapped up, her gaze fierce and unwavering.

"Tell me, _Shinichi_ –" The way she said his name sent shivers down his spine, and not in a good way. " – Did you find this funny? Did it _amuse_ you to make a fool of me like this?" She was trembling, her anger building up inside her, but, somewhere in the back of her mind, she knew these accusations were ridiculous, that there was no way he could have _wanted_ to be like this, but she pushed the thought away. That is, until he spoke, seeming to have read her mind.

"Do you honestly think I _wanted_ to be like this?" She heard her thoughts repeated back to her. "Ran, I think you know me better than that. Don't you understand…?" He trailed off for a moment, trying to steady himself. His voice had a begging tone to it, and he knew it, but he couldn't let himself break down now. He had to finish what he had started. "Don't you understand," he began again, "how much it _hurt_ me to see you like this? To see you suffer and know that _I_ was the cause of it?"

She opened her mouth to speak, but he cut her off. "Please. Just let me finish. Once I'm done, just say the word, and I will be out of your life forever." It looked as if it caused him physical pain to say those words, and Ran's anger dissipated, as she realized that he actually thought that this was the end of their…friendship and potential relationship. She, on the other hand, knew she would never ask him to leave, because, let's face it, a life without Shinichi wouldn't be much of a life at all, especially if one were to use the past few months as a standard. Before she could put his fears to rest, though, he pressed forward.

"There's this…Organization. Do you remember that day at Tropical Land?" He laughed, but there was no humor in it. It was a pathetic sound. "Of course you do…" He paused for what seemed like an eternity. Then, he shook his head, as if snapping himself back into reality. "I followed those men in black…I was spying on them, listening in on their conversation, when, suddenly, I was hit from behind. They…they forced some kind of poison…into my mouth." Ran stared, spellbound. He looked as if he was going to cry, but did not stop. "I blacked out and, when I woke up, I was seven years old again. I…I…didn't know what happened, so I went to my house. You came over, and, I knew you would recognize me, so I grabbed the glasses, the first 'disguise' that popped into my mind."

His voice had grown thick, and he could feel the tears coming. Strange that this was the first time he felt the urge to cry. He never meant for it to turn out like this. He tried to speak faster, to get it all out, before the tears consumed him. "And you asked my name, and I looked at the books on my bookshelf. Edogawa Rampo and Sir Arthur Conan Doyle suddenly merged into one and, before I knew what had happened, I was Edogawa Conan." He knew he was starting to ramble but was unable to stop himself. "God, Ran, I didn't want to lie to you. You have to believe me. I was trying to…protect you." Seeing the confused look on her face, he took a few deep breaths, trying to steady himself, and then continued.

"That poison was meant to kill me, and if those men in black ever found out I was alive… and if they understood you knew who I was…Oh, God, I couldn't even bear to think of what would happen to you. And I know you're probably thinking 'why come to live with me if you were so worried about me?' And the answer to that is…is simple. I was selfish."

He stopped for a moment, trying to choose his words carefully. "I told Agasa-hakase that living at the Detective Agency would provide me with leads to those men in black, and, while that is true, that wasn't the only reason…the _real_ reason…I…had to be near you. I had to _protect_ you. From the men in black and…certain other people."

_Guys_, he thought to himself, and he almost chuckled. But then he looked at Ran, at the pained expression on her face, and the cold, harsh reality came crashing down upon him again. "I never thought I would be stuck like this for so long. I thought I'd get a lead within the first month, that I'd be back in my old body in no time, but...Fate sometimes plays cruel tricks on us, and, before I knew it, so much time had passed. So many nights when I watched you cry, so many times that I wanted to tell you, but I just…couldn't. I…I knew I wouldn't be able to live with myself if they tried to use you to get to me, and I…couldn't imagine a life in which I didn't see you every day."

As he said those words, a few tears had escaped his eyes, and, suddenly, he found himself unable to continue. His shoulders trembled, as he was consumed by grief, and he felt Ran's arms wrap around him unexpectedly.

"Shhhh. Don't cry, Shinichi," she whispered soothingly. "Don't worry. I'm not going anywhere..." She paused and then added, "And I forgive you."

Shinichi turned his head towards her and blushed at their proximity, recalling the dream he had had about her that very morning. Ran started to move closer, but suddenly pulled away, shaking her head vigorously. When she glanced back at him, she could see he was hurt by her rejection, and she couldn't help but giggle. He caught her eye, completely perplexed, and she knew she should explain.

"I know you're Shinichi but…well…" She wasn't sure how he would take this, but it had to be said. The words came out in a rush. "You'reinConan'sbodyandIdon'twanttobeapedophile."

For a moment, she thought he didn't understand, so she drew in a breath, determined to repeat her statement coherently, but before she could, he laughed. And suddenly, his shoulders were shaking from laughter instead of tears, and then she began to laugh with him. They sat there like that for a long time, her arms wrapped around his tiny body, both laughing at the absurdity of the situation. Eventually, they lapsed into silence, until Shinichi turned again to look at her.

"Well, Ran," he began, "now you know everything there is to know about me." A playful smile tugged at the corners of his lips. "And, I would say I know everything there is to know about you, given all the things I learned as Conan…"

She blushed furiously at that statement, but knew exactly what to say to wipe that smirk of his face. "True," she said simply, and, for one blissful moment, Shinichi thought she was going to let him win this one, but he saw a mischievous gleam in her eye and prepared himself for the worst. "Although, I would say I know a little too much, given the _state_ I found you in this morning."

And now it was Shinichi's turn to blush, his head red as a tomato. He began to stammer, "I – uh, well…you see – er…" he trailed off pitifully.

"Cat got your tongue, tantei-san?" she asked teasingly.

Determined to get the upper hand back, he looked at her with all seriousness and said, "I don't know what possessed you to forgive me, but I am so incredibly glad you did, because, from now on, we can face everything, the good and the bad, together."

She looked into his eyes and understood that he meant every word. "That's simple, silly," she said, full of courage. She knew he was confused, so she elaborated. "I forgave you because…" And her courage faltered for a moment, but he was looking at her expectantly, and she figured it was now or never, so she said, "Because I love you."

He openly gaped at her, and, for one sickening moment, she thought he would reject her, but then he spoke. "Hold on." That's what he said And now it was her turn to gape. And then he hopped off her lap, ran out of the room and then returned with his – Conan's – bowtie. His _bowtie_? _What_? And she saw him fiddle with something on the back of it, but before she could ask what he was doing, Shinichi's voice came floating towards her. From the bowtie. She thought she had lost her mind.

"Agasa-hakase made it," he explained before she had the chance to ask. Figures. She felt comprehension dawning, as she realized that was how she heard his voice on all those phone calls. She was brimming with so many questions, but, before she could speak, Shinichi's voice surrounded her again.

"I wanted to tell you when I was back in my own body, but I realized that the time to say it is now, so I figured I could settle for saying it in my own voice…I love you, too. I've loved ever since we were kids. Ever since I knew what love was, and, if you'll have me, I don't plan on ever letting you go." He felt elated and…relieved. He'd held those words inside for so long, he thought he may never get the chance to say them.

Before he knew what was happening, Ran had pulled him into a tight embrace. "Don't you _ever_ leave me again…" she whispered forcefully. She held him for what seemed like an eternity, until, suddenly, she pulled back.

She raised an eyebrow, giving him a look up and down, and then said, "Sleeping Kogoro…?"

He looked at her sheepishly, while worrying in the back of his mind if she would change her mind about everything. "Ummm…yeah," was all he could bring himself to say.

She stared at him for a moment and then quietly said, "Baka." And then she smiled – the most beautiful smile in the world.

Kudo Shinichi was back. Not in the way he had hoped, but he was back nonetheless, and he wasn't going anywhere anytime soon.

_Fin._

**Omake**

After chatting for a while, Ran, visibly exhausted, had decided to go back to bed for a little bit. Shinichi lay on the couch for some time, lost in thought, before deciding to go watch her sleep. He crept into her room, just as he had many times before (and no, it was not stalkerish, thank you very much!), but, this time, he was in for a surprise. Ran, was apparently dreaming… of something quite similar to his very own dream from earlier that morning. He felt a blush creeping up on his cheeks, and he knew he should leave. Really. But, he had a habit of doing the opposite of what was best for him, as evidenced by that fateful day at Tropical Land, and, instead of heading for the door, he pulled up a chair, situating himself right next to her bed. Not stalkerish at all…

Of course, Fate had a knack for intervening at the most inopportune times, and Ran's eyes fluttered open. "Shinichi…?" she said, and, not fully awake yet and, clearly not in control of her actions, she kissed him. It was over far too quickly, and her lips felt like they were on fire. That is, until she realized that she was now officially a pedophile. But before she could say anything, Shinichi cried out in pain.

His body was on fire. Not in a 'burning with passion' kind of way, but in the 'Oh-God-will-this-pain-ever-end' kind of way. The weird thing was, he'd felt this pain before. It was the way he felt when he was changing back. He clutched at his chest and staggered out of the room. His breathing was labored, and he was sweating profusely. Ran chased after him, but he had locked himself in his – Conan's – room. Many anguished cries of pain later, after what seemed like an eternity, he unlocked the door, opening it just enough to poke his head out.

Ran almost fainted. It was Shinichi's head staring at her. The _real_ Shinichi. The _17-year-old_ Shinichi.

"Ummm, do you think I could borrow some of your dad's clothes?" He grinned at her sheepishly, and she couldn't help but blush at the thought of why he was hiding behind the door.

A few minutes later on, they were sitting on the couch, chatting animatedly. Well, sort of.

"Jesus, Ran, will you stop poking me already? You're not imagining this. I'm not imagining this. I'm here. I don't know for how long, but I know this is _not_ part of your dream." He drew the last part out slowly, and laughed, as it had the desired effect on Ran. Now, they were even.

Ran pushed the thoughts of her dream out of her mind, determined not to let him get to her. "I don't get it," she said. "I mean, what happened?"

Shinichi grinned – God, he had an amazing smile – "Dunno. True love's kiss, I guess?"

This, however, seemed to really trouble Ran. "What's wrong, now?" he asked upon seeing her worried expression.

"What if I kiss you again, and you turn back?" She paused. "I don't think I could handle that."

To be honest, the thought hadn't really occurred to Shinichi, and, for a moment, his expression appeared pained, as if he were having some internal struggle. He made a split-second decision, saying, "Aww, to Hell with it." And then he crushed his lips against Ran's. The kiss was forceful. Passionate. Breathtaking. They pulled apart after what seemed like an eternity, both gasping for air.

Shinichi looked himself up and down, put his hands in front of his face, repeating his motions from earlier that morning, and smiled. "Well, looks like you were worried for – OH, GOD!" His handsome features were distorted from pain, and, for a moment, Ran felt ill.

But then, he smiled that famous smile that had all his fan-girls swooning and said, "Just kidding."

She blinked at him. And blinked. And blinked. And for a few seconds, Shinichi wondered if he had made a grave error, but then her lips curled into a smile, and she said, "Baka."

He never would have guessed that Ran's kiss was the "antidote" to the Black Organization's poison and was mentally kicking himself for not trying the "True Love's Kiss Approach" (as he had dubbed it) earlier. He wondered how Haibara would react when she saw him and if she had any clue whose kiss would be _her_ antidote. Personally, he was rooting for Mitsuhiko, but somehow found it unlikely.

He turned his thoughts back to Ran. Reflecting on the day's events, he had an idea. "Hey, Ran," he said, "What would you say about acting out those dreams we were having?" He wagged his eyebrows suggestively and couldn't help but wonder when he became so daring.

"Shiniiiichi," Ran said in what she hoped sounded like a scolding voice. "Do you think you could settle for some cuddling?" She batted her eyelashes at him, wondering when she had become so flirtatious.

Shinichi pretended to think it over for a moment, scrunching up his face in concentration, finally saying, "Yeah. I think that would do just fine."

Kudo Shinichi was back. Lying with his arms wrapped around Ran's waist, listening to her light breathing, he realized that, sometimes, reality was better than your dreams.

**A/N:** So, there you have it. My first fic. I know that it's not nearly as well written as many other DC fics that I've read, but I'm a little proud of myself just for finishing it. I'm sure you can spot traces of other writers in my own writing, but, hey, can you blame me? I just read every Heji/Kazuha, Kaito/Aoko, Shinichi/Ran, and Takagi/Satou _40_ (or _30_, depending) _Kisses, Hugs, Nights,_ and _Ways_ fic out there in the span of less than a week. So, don't fault me for using generic phrases about how his "lips claimed hers possessively" and whatnot. ;) And, yes, I know that they were a bit OOC, but I always imagined areally emotional reunion upon Shinichi's return. While I know that a lot of people don't think Ran will forgive him so easily, I can't help but think that their red string that binds them is strong enough to withstand anything. I guess it's the Hopeless Romantic within me. Well, this was already ridiculously long enough without me rambling on at the end, so, if you made it this far, thanks for reading, and please review! I think I have a cute idea for a Heiji/Kazuha fic, but I want to know if anybody likes my writing before I sit down and spew out another monstrosity. So, that's all I have to say. Hope you liked it! :D


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